Priorities

Wow – so it’s been over a year since I wrote in here. I have a lot to say, but I was pregnant, started a new job, had the baby, and then somehow am now surviving life in Shelter-in-Place.

People staying at home suddenly find that there is an abundance in time on their hands. The thing about humans is that we always find some way to fill up free time. There is always an unending list of things to do, things to accomplish, etc. etc. Even with the advent of technology that is meant to speed up how things are done, we still manage to fill in the spaces.

Lately, I’ve been thinking about how to prioritize my time. I already do it for some instances. Like, I know I am super behind on what is cool on television (something about a Tiger King? a documentary of Jared Kushner?) But I’m okay with that. I don’t watch a lot of tv and it’s not my favorite way to spend leisure time. I don’t mind that I don’t know what people are talking about or that I don’t understand the latest memes around it.

So what is important to me? I enjoy journaling. I downloaded an app called “Day One” and have started journaling to my baby. I used to journal a lot but my childhood through college age journals mysteriously disappeared after my ex and I broke up. A part of me is sad those journals are gone, but I’ve managed to start many instances of journals over the years. I hope Day One sticks.

What else do I enjoy? I used to exercise in every latest form possible – yoga, Barry’s, megaformer, rock climbing, whatever. Given the time constraints due to baby and nursing, I realized I like yoga and climbing the most. Given the constraints with the coronavirus, I can only really do yoga at home.

I think a part of this is just learning that you can’t keep up with the tide of everything. You pick what you want to spend your time on, and then you enjoy it for it is. Everyone is different – energy wise as well as priorities. My husband has unbounded energy, can watch documentaries until his eyes bleed and can run around doing whatever he wants forever. But that’s his choice and he finds it sustainable, so kudos to him.

I used to think that maybe I wanted to open a yoga studio, or build an online presence or be x or y or z. I’ve come to realize that what makes me happiest is cutting down on what I want, doing well on what I can and to stop chasing things just to make everyone else think I’m relevant.

Which brings me to my closing questions for you: What do you really value with your time? What is it that you want from your life? When you lie on your death bed, was it all worth it?

[Photo: Me and my latest #1 priority in South Lake Tahoe at Van Sickle National Park.]

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